A story about intoxicants that seldom misses

The long standing quarrel about how to mix a proper Martini
has been around as long as the drink itself.
A clever quip by way of Bennett Cerf
from his book
"The Life of the Party" 
An intrepid explorer set out singlehanded for the Amazonian jungle in Brazil. Authorities equipped him with all the necessary gear, topped off with a miniature bottle of gin, another of vermouth, and a tiny mixer.
 "What's this for?" asked the explorer. You know I don't drink."
 "That's in case you're hopelessly lost, without another human being around for miles," was the answer. "Mix yourself a martini. Somebody's absolutely certain to pop up and tell you, 'Don't make it that way: make it this way.' "

Drawing by Carl Rose

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